Thursday, January 3, 2013

An Active Magic of the Heart

"One may read this and think it's magic. But falling in love is an active magic, and so is writing."
-Ruby Sparks

     Love is a cycle of effervescent joy and delirious sadness. The cycle never breaks. It is just passed on to different forms and moments. Heartbreak may not happen to you but you can pass it on to someone else you have done wrong. Then they will do the same thing you did to them, good or bad. This cycle will not stop unless all humans fail to love and quits the action of loving and receiving love.

     Surely the feeling is great when you are at the part in the cycle of being happy. You will always feel that you become special for someone. You feel that life is worth living. Don't get me wrong here. Yes love is what makes all the good in the world but the complexity of love may lead someone in the deepest sadness of the world and may never get back to the happy surface. What I'm trying to deal with is that a person needs love and to feel it flowing in and out of his/her system but too much of anything will drown you down the biggest trench of despair.

     For the past months I've really divided my perceptions of love into two things. Hoping too much and not caring at all. From the very start, I really am a hopeless romantic person. I love to hope for things that exist in fairytail, love songs and films. But after considering frantic situations in my life I turn to the state of being unhappy and emotional.

    Nevertheless emotions are human nature. These exist as a reminder for us that we feel something and we're always different from inanimate objects that don't feel anything. So be grateful if you feel pain or joy because you're human and it shows :) Just like a line in Paramore's Hello Cold World, "You say you're really hurting, at least you're feeling something". Feelings give you a tick of awareness around you. Just remember to keep moving forward and never stop the habit of feeling because life then would stop with it. And surely you don't want to end your life just like that.

With the coming of the new year, new hopes and instances are greatly ahead of us all. So Happy New Year and may we welcome 2013 with a big warm hug.

Friday, September 9, 2011

The Epic Randomness of the World

It has been exactly a month since the day I was able to write my third blog. It is still the first semester of my college life but still life has been hard and a bit stressful for the past few weeks. I just study all my readings given by our instructors, do a lot of term papers and sleep, and eat a lot as well ( I usually put all my stress into food, or I am really just hungry). A lot has also happened with my life, it really entwines between the clean cut between studies and home. I have not been able to participate in social activities, have not written any blogs or even update my planner, read any adventure or informative books :( I am really bored to what has my life circled upon. Then at the most dreadful moments of my life I wish I had a high quality camera so that I could capture everything I wish to document no matter how silly or lame it is as long as it captures my attention. I really want one, and I have been saving up for that. It is still a few money for now but in time it will grow and be just enough for the camera I need. I feel that I need it for my journalism ideals and careers. Well, even though I am not venturing to photojournalism, I would like to capture moments where I am able to got this news and so on and so forth.
 Am I really this random, from school works to food to  camera. Whoa! I know it is really late and I guess any minute now my mom would call me to go to bed to sleep for I have to do lot of stuff tomorrow or later :) and she wants me to be comforted with the warm bed on a cold night. I so love my mom, even though I kept a bit of a personal secret these past months to her and she was able to find out. Well, even though we have fights and stuff I will not exchange my mom for any other mom. She will still be the best mom for me, even though this sentence is really overused, I will still use it to describe her.
I guess I need to go to sleep, by next time I hope I will be able to tell all interesting stuff I have learned from my instructors in this premiere university I am at.
Good night :)

Wednesday, August 10, 2011


Hindi ko maipaliwanag kung bakit pero sa gabing ito, ako ay nababagabag.  Siguro marahil wala pa akong magawang draft sa isang asignatura ko. Sa Biyernes na kasi ang pasahan nito at nagsisimula pa lang ako sa pinakamaikling parte ng report paper na ito- ang thesis statement.  Nakakaloka diba!?!

Isa pa marahil ay wala pa akong napapapirmahan sa kinakailangang signature sheet sa aming organization.  Applicant pa lang ako kaya mahirap pang proseso ang pinagdaraanan ko ngayon.
At ang huling dumurog ng aking puso't kalooban ay nang sinabi ng nanay ko (kahit pabiro) na ayaw niya sa lalaking gusto ko :'(
Sana lang tlga hindi ko narinig yun, kasi ang sakit pakinggan, sumisikip ang puso ko bawat minutong naaalala ko.  Paano ko sasabihin na hindi ko kayang mawalay sa minamahal ko? Pagpasensyahan niyo na ako kung masyadong korny at mababaw ang pinaghihimutukan ko sa pananaw ng ibang tao, ngunit kailangan ko lang mailabas ang aking nararamdaman sa pamamagitan ng pagsulat dito.
Hindi ako papayag na mangyari yun, bagkus ay kailangang makita ng nanay ko na isang mabuti at responsableng tao ang minamahal ko. 

Haay... nakakalungkot lang talaga, sana mawaglit na sa isipan ko ang mga ganitong problema nang sa ganun ay mamuhay ako ng masaya.

Saturday, August 6, 2011


It feels really weird to think that you can't really understand what you feel, what you want.  It's already midnight and I still don't know what should be my first priority- to do stuffs or to sleep.  Today I am writing a sheepishly blog, so not great for pioneer blog, it's not that epic, but it's intricate. Aside from the confusion of my priority, I am so confused with what I am feeling today. I can sense that I'm happy, the next moment I am deeply sad and lastly I am quite terrified of something yet to be known. I can't fully understand what I am feeling and thinking right now.
 Really, I am a complicated person, but I would like to have a sparkle of light in my blogs, a splash of good vibes bursting with positive senses of life. I hope I will be able to guarantee myself and fellow bloggers with this kind of theme.
I finally decide to continue on what I am about to start. :)